Decisions made by others are often different than the ones I would have taken. Sometimes they feel poor and even turn out to be bad. Sometimes they are not fair.

Fairness doesn’t really exist though. And decisions have to neither be good nor fair.

The decision-maker faces the consequences of every decision they make. This includes the good decisions, the bad decisions, the fair ones, but also the good ones someone has misread and or the ones that make sense on a level but aren’t fair in someone else’s mind.

We’re working in a complex system of people where everyone has their own wishes, interests, hopes, view of reality, and understanding of fairnesss. Not everyone will constantly be aware the world doesn’t revolve around them. In a sense, from every person’s own point of view, it sort of does.

Nothing is ever guaranteed, and fairness is a made-up concept. We should try to treat people with respect, try to understand what they want, and be mindful of them.

We can’t expect everyone will be willing or able to do the same for us. Even if they could read thoughts.

It’s because in a system this complex, needs and expectations of the different people involved are in conflict.